31-year-old New Zealand earthquake specialist gets even with 28-year-old coworker who undermines her in front of clients: 'I turned to the clients and said, "Actually, Brendan's made an error"'

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Nov 23, 2025 11:00 AM EST

What could be more satisfying than getting back at the coworker who keeps taking credit for your work? In the workplace, this happens all the time — maybe it's even happened to you. You're sitting in a meeting and pitch a great idea that you've been pondering for days. There's barely any response, but then a few minutes later, your colleague pitches the same idea, and this time, your boss pays attention and loves the idea. If you protest about this, it doesn't always make you look good, but if you ignore it, that same coworker can keep doing that over and over again! It's a hard cycle to break, but at a certain point, you just have to address the elephant in the room and stand up for yourself. 

This woman realized that she had to take a stand for herself, and it's a good thing she did, because the safety of New Zealand residents was at stake. It's one of the most earthquake-prone areas in the entire world! So structural engineers like this woman provide a crucial service to residents. She shared that her specialty is "earthquake retrofitting," and with 8 years of experience, she's very qualified to inform clients about what their buildings need to withstand big earth-shaking moments. 

However, her colleague Brendan is under the assumption that she knows nothing, and he keeps explaining basic concepts to her in front of clients! It's totally impolite and unnecessary, and in a job that involves public safety, it's important that she did speak up to inform her clients of what they needed to know. 

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  • 01

    'Male coworker kept mansplaining my job to me so I publicly corrected his structural calculations in front of clients'

    Man in yellow shirt gestures toward phone held by woman sitting next to him, wearing white and looking hesitant while gripping the phone with both hands
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02
    I'm 31F, structural engineer in Christchurch. I specialize in earthquake retrofitting which is obviously pretty important here. Been doing this for eight years, have my chartership, the whole thing.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 03
    This new guy Brendan joined our firm maybe five months ago. He's 28, came from Auckland with like two years experience. Nice enough at first but then he started doing this thing where he'd explain basic engineering concepts to me. Like stuff I learned in my second year of uni.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 04
    First time he explained what a shear wall was to me I thought maybe he was just nervous or something. Trying to seem knowledgeable. Whatever.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 05
    But then it kept happening. He'd explain soil liquefaction to me. I wrote my thesis on soil liquefaction in Christchurch. He explained moment frames to me in a meeting. In front of clients.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 06
    I tried to brush it off but it was getting embarrassing. My boss noticed and asked if everything was okay and I said yeah just Brendan being enthusiastic. Didn't want to seem like I couldn't handle it.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 07
    The breaking point was two weeks ago. We were on site doing an assessment of a building that needed retrofitting. The clients were there, building owners, their lawyer, the whole crew. And Brendan starts explaining to me how to calculate lateral loads. While I'm literally in the middle of doing the calculations.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 08
    I was so done. So I just let him talk. He kept going, getting more confident, and then he said something wrong. He mixed up the seismic weight calculation, used the wrong formula for the site class.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 09
    And I just. Let him finish. Then I turned to the clients and said "actually Brendan's made an error there, this is site class D not C, so the calculation needs to account for the softer soil profile. The building would fail with his numbers."
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 10
    His face went red. I pulled out my tablet and showed them the correct calculations, explained why his approach would've been dangerous, basically did a whole five minute thing on why you need to actually understand local soil conditions.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 11
    One of the clients actually said "oh so you're the one we should be listening to then." Brendan tried to say he just misspoke but I was like no, that's a fundamental error that could've meant inadequate strengthening.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 12
    He barely talked for the rest of the site visit. When we got back to the office he pulled me aside and said I embarrassed him on purpose. I said yeah I did actually, because he's been embarrassing me for months by treating me like I don't know my own job.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 13
    He went to our boss complaining that I was unprofessional. Boss asked what happened and when I explained, boss basically said maybe Brendan should focus more on learning from senior engineers than explaining things to them.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 14
    Brendan's been weird with me since. Like overly polite but also clearly annoyed. Some of the other guys think I went too far doing it in front of clients.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 15
    But like. He was literally giving them wrong information. That's not just annoying that's dangerous.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 16
    Also maybe don't mansplain earthquake engineering to someone who's been working in Christchurch through all the retrofitting for the past eight years.
    via u/LoudStatistician9077
  • 17

    People encouraged this worker, telling her that she stepped up at the right moment

    SkiyeBlueFox Honestly, I'd rather watch my engineer bitch out someone who doesn't know what theyre doing than have my building collapse
    via u/SkiyeBlueFox
  • 18
    Safe_Place8432 I feel like you did him a favor professionally by calling him. out in front of clients because this way he will likely think twice about mansplaining in his next job. Because he got the cringe was from the clients- had you called it out privately or at the office it would have been the whole uptight feeemale schtick.
    via u/Safe_Place8432
  • 19
    Silvaria928 As a woman who has to put up with mansplaining all the time, this was incredibly satisfying! Good for you!
    via u/Silvaria928
  • 20
    Man in yellow shirt points to phone in his hand, next to him, woman in white shirt points to herself and shrugs
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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